Who told mother nature it was okay to dump more snow on me? I thought we’d left the snow behind us for the season. I even wore flip-flops yesterday.
I want the sunshine back.
I’m still looking for an apartment in the new city. This new city I’m moving to is a lot more expensive than the one I am presently living in. My rent is going to increase and I’ll likely have 1/3 of the space in my new place. I’m nervous about downsizing for more money. I’m always nervous about money. As an adult, does that feeling ever go away? Maybe if you’re Elon Musk. I guess for us normal folk it’s likely something we always worry about. At least I hope I’m not alone with these thoughts constantly running through my mind. It’s not like I cannot afford things. I just kind of wish there was a little more money left over for rainy days than there will be. Does that make sense?
They should’ve warned me about feelings like these when I was a kid.
I think my general fears about regular adult things have to do with my imposter syndrome. Spending as much time as I have working through past and present trauma the last few months, I’ve learned that a lot of my issues are rooted in my own insecurities and imposter syndrome. While I go through moments of feeling like a badass, I would say more often than not, I find myself feeling not good enough for most things and people. Sad, I know.
One more thing before I go – If anyone has a medium.com account, let me know and I’ll follow you on the site. Right now my ‘for you page’ is less than stellar. I might as well fill it with people who’s thoughts I enjoy reading.